Today is Libby's third birthday. I woke up to her asking me something about her birthday and I said, "oh yeah - it's your birthday! Do you want me to sing you the Happy Birthday Song?" "Yes", she said. So I sang it as we made up her bed and a few minutes later she said so sweetly, "Thanks for singing the Happy Birthday Song to me mommy."
Have I mentioned that I love that girl!
I have thought about Libby's birthmother all day. I read Libby her lifebook this morning. For the first time Libby was a little confused about who we were praying for when I said, "let's pray for your birthmommy." She pointed to me and said, "mommy?". I tried to explain but she's not able to fully comprehend just yet.
I am so thankful for her birthmother. She chose - whatever her circumstance - she chose to give Libby life! What would my life be like without Libby? I can't even go there....
Sometime in the night of Nov 23rd, 2005 Libby was clothed and gently laid down in a box and placed on a busy roadside near a baby hospital. It is likely that in the dark that very someone hid somewhere out of sight and watched to make sure she was found. And indeed, the morning of the 24th Libby was found - a little baby whose hair was still damp and whose eyes still had secretion on them from the birth. After much crying - which I am able to presume now that I know how much Libby does not like being alone - someone picked her up and rescued her to a safe place. But Libby was never really lost. Whether someone stayed to watch after her or not on that dark, cold night -Jesus was there with angels, watching over her - an orphan - a helpless, innocent baby with nothing but the clothes on her back and a box. Oh how I know the love of Jesus was there in that moment gently whispering to her - "Wait, baby girl, wait. I have a beautiful plan for you. Hang in there. You're not alone. I'm here. Go ahead and cry. It's okay. I'm hear. I have not forsaken you. Wait, baby girl, the sun is about to rise - the light will come. Shhhh, don't worry. I'm here and I have a plan. Here, let me keep you warm until you see the sun. The light is coming." Tomorrow morning I will celebrate in my heart even more than I did on this day of her birth - because the light did come. Because He was faithful. Because He did have such a plan - of hope, beauty, love. A plan that included me - for which I am forever grateful beyond words.
I've been working on a song that's more like a letter to Libby's birthmother. I have only shared it with a few friends and even since then I have changed some parts - but today seems like the right day to post it. It's the best way I can sum up my gratitude, ponderings and prayers for the Chinese woman who chose to give her daughter - my daughter - life - a life that God used to set me free in so many ways - fulfilling the name He placed on my heart for her - Liberty.
"If You Could See What I See"
words and music: Cindy Foote
(c) Billy Foote Songs 2008
verse 1:
I know you must wonder
Is she warm and well fed
Is she loved, is she happy
And where does she live
You must have cried a thousand times
Lonely tears from deep inside but
In your desperateness
chorus 1:
If you could see what I see
Dancing here in front of me with
Your eyes, your smile, all aglow
Would you know the grace of God
Who saw your tears and broken heart
And heard your cries, yes He heard your cries.
verse 2:
I know you must wonder,
Is she thinking of you
Does she wonder where you are
Is she sad or confused
You must have cried a thousand times
Wondering what she feels inside but
In your desperateness
chorus 2:
If you could see what I see
Praying right next to me for
Your heart, your soul, oh oh
Would you know the grace of God
Who sees her tears and loving heart
And hears her cries, yes He hears her cries too
verse 3:
I know you must wonder
Who her mom and dad are
How I wish we could show you
How she's captured our hearts
You must have cried a thousand times
Wondering who holds your child but
In your desperateness
chorus 3:
If you could see what I see
Sleeping with her daddy
In his arms, of love, so secure
Would you know the grace of God
Who put the longing in our hearts
To love a child and He heard our cries too
Bridge:
Oh the grace of God
To see our hearts and hear us
Oh the grace of God
To mend our hearts and heal us
Oh the grace of God
To see our hearts and hear us
Oh the grace of God
To mend our hearts and heal us....
Sunday, November 23, 2008
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10 comments:
cindy, those song lyrics are absolutely amazing!! i can't wait to hear the whole thing put together! i'm always blessed by reading your blog! thanks for being an inspiration!
What a special song, Cindy! I'm so glad you posted it. I cannot wait to hear it one day!
So beautiful, beautiful! happy birthday Liberty!
Thank you for sharing. The story and song are absolutely beautiful.
Okay Cindy, the tears are flowing! That song is amazing and so is your little girl. Happy Birthday Libby!
Happy Bday! Your daughter is so sweet. Thank you for sharing the song lyrics...so beautiful. I can't wait to hear it.
~Tricia
(fellow Xuwen mommy)
Cindy,
Oh how your words bless my heart. . . I had never thought about God comforting Teddi while she was all alone. I know in my heart that He was there with her as she waited (on a January day in 2005) to be found. I just never imagined Him whispering hope to her heart quite like that. The tears flow . . . and my heart is comforted.
And all of that was before I read the song -- which I saw as soon as you posted, but just now have the strength to get through it again.. . . and then still comment! We are just home six months, so it is all so fresh . . .
Your words again are beautiful, and healing. Thank you for sharing what God has placed on your heart. It does this mama's heart much good.
Blessings to you ~
Tina
Happy birthday, sweet cousin Libby. Hugs from Cousin Ninon and her parents from France
Hi Cindy,
My husband Eric works with Kelly at ECBC. I came over from Carissa's blog actually. It is so nice to "meet" you and read this post. I cried so much, especially while reading the song! It is so beautiful! It is significant to me because I was adopted by my parents when I was 2 months old, and I have continued to pray for the last several years that God would allow me to meet my birthparents. Thank you for sharing your heart and the song God has given you with the rest of us!!! Happy Birthday, Libby!
Cindy, Just perfectly shared for everyone touched by adoption. I pray daily for my daughters and the children God has for them. May we be inspired by you and Billy. Christina Chambers (Alysia Brown's mom) Thank you for all that you and Billy do for Isaac & Alysia, Praise to God!!
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